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#621603 06/28/18 02:08 PM
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Researchers for the Massachusetts Department of Transportation (MassDOT) found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.

However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.

MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger.

The conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say "Cah", none could say "Truck”


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Professor Shadow #621606 06/28/18 03:03 PM
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You sir, are not right.

I like that about you.


Sometimes the thoughts in my head get so bored, they go for a stroll through my mouth. This is rarely a good thing.
Professor Shadow #621608 06/28/18 03:44 PM
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History not News.


One day, Einstein has to speak at an important science conference.

On the way there, he tells his driver that looks a bit like him:
"I'm sick of all these conferences. I always say the same things over and over!"
The driver agrees: "You're right. As your driver, I attended all of them, and even though I don't know anything about science, I could give the conference in your place."
"That's a great idea!" says Einstein. "Let's switch places then!"

So they switch clothes and as soon as they arrive, the driver dressed as Einstein goes on stage and starts giving the usual speech, while the real Einstein, dressed as the car driver, attends it.

But in the crowd, there is one scientist who wants to impress everyone and thinks of a very difficult question to ask Einstein, hoping he won't be able to respond. So this guy stands up and interrupts the conference by posing his very difficult question. The whole room goes silent, holding their breath, waiting for the response.

The driver looks at him, dead in the eye, and says :

"Sir, your question is so easy to answer that I'm going to let my driver reply to it for me."


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Professor Shadow #621622 06/28/18 09:22 PM
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Must have been a slow news day here in the Boston area. I don't remember this story making the general news outlets. crazy


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dexman #621627 06/29/18 12:06 AM
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Originally Posted by dexman
Must have been a slow news day here in the Boston area. I don't remember this story making the general news outlets. crazy
Perhaps it was in The Onion...


Dean
Photographs:
https://www.instagram.com/deanwilsoncanby/
https://fstoppers.com/profile/deanwilsoncanby
https://www.facebook.com/Dean-Wilson-Photography-112841337020414

Please don't confuse your "Internet Search" with my licenses, certifications and over 30 years experience.

"Thank you for calling Technical Support. If you feel you have reached this number in error, please hang up and press redial."
Professor Shadow #621631 06/29/18 02:20 AM
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That figures..... blush


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